Wednesday, 13 December 2006


When I was but a youngster,
Christmas meant one thing
That I'd be getting lots of toys that day.
I learned a whole lot diff'rent
When Mother sat me down
And taught me to spell Christmas this way:

C is for the Christ Child born upon this day
H for herald angels in the night
R means our Redeemer
I means Israel
S is for the star that shone so bright
T is for three wise men, they who traveled far
M is for the manger where He lay
A is for all He stands for
S means shepherds came
And that's why there's a Christmas Day

Monday, 11 December 2006

A few pomes i have wrote

The Rain

The wind picked up across the mores one cold Autumn morn
the clouds grew big and black
as black as the ace of spades
they came in two, they came in four
they came in hundreds and some more
with then they brought the rain
rushing down from the sky
harder and harder the the rain came down that day
as sharp as a razor the rain came down that day
then a break in the clouds
the sun was back to stay
but with your wet clothes on
you'll never forget the rain.

A life guard
ho to be a life guard on a summers day
where the sun beats down into a haze,
and people laugh and people cry,
the heat is strong today
the water is warm, and life goes on,
a kid goes down
its no fun anymore
oh to be a life guard on a summers day.

A life like this

When we come we come in peace,
to live such a life as this,
with misery, shame and crime,
we must live a life as this,
we hide behind a mask,
so people cant see our face,
ho why must we live a life like this,
why cant the truth come out today,
then we no longer need,
to live a life such as this.

Wednesday, 6 December 2006

The gospel of blossom

Tuesday night my visit to zacs , the topic was Sheppard's, continuing in the Christmas theme. i wish we could make a TV program on our studies it would make for better viewing than the likes of question time and probably get more viewers, the topic as normal was held together by Sean who did start laughing himself which just encouraged blossom and zippy in to a two man act which has to be seen . a preamble about cabbage eating lions as normal had everyone in stitches, but as normal nobody missed the main point of the study. Liz wrote a monologue about a Sheppard boy that really touched me, as by now you know that i struggle with Christmas but this year I'm really looking forward to it, as i think for once it it will not be about me but Jesus. as for my topic well if you you want to know more come to zacs and listen to the word of God from the people he uses.

Tuesday, 5 December 2006

wrc pics

sit down have a cupper and then read

Hi all its been ages since my last blog a lot has happened in my little world.
1st as you are aware i have been with the Wales rally GB (world rally cars) for all of last week and it was hard but good i was in the service park and my main roll was to ensure the safety of spectators, this i managed to do as no rally cars hit any spectators in my areas. my other rolls included escorting VIP guests to the rally teams that they were visiting. 2Nd my roll was to make sure that there were no VIPs or other people blocking the views of the public so they could get some photos and be able to see the work being done. which i managed to do to the best of my ability. 3rd was controlling the marshals who did an excellent job and i could not have been as effective in my job without them, so if any of you read this I'm really thankful to the long hours you all put in thank you. (5-6 am starts till they get told they can go) its very hard, other things that happened in my area included a youth collapsed and i ended up giving him mouth to mouth which i hope wont give him nightmares I've never done that before and i always thought id panic and freeze but it didn't happen i just did what i had to do so i hope that he will go on to lead a full life.

my talks with god have been a bit abstract this week we have spoken but not as much as i would have liked.

some of the nice things about the rally was meeting people i haven't seen since last year and renewing friendships again (team york (hobbit and blakey aka Charlotte) )

well its Tuesday so its zacs tonight will be nice to see every one as my life moves back to normal. I have discovered something about my self that I'm finding disturbing that i have a fear of being trapped . what i mean is yesterday while in my sons car the door wouldn't open and i just started to panic i needed to get out then latter on i was stuck behind some people and again felt the same panic come over me.

well that's it for now ill post some photos of last week as well

may your god bless you and look after you

Wednesday, 29 November 2006


Zacs again last night topic Angels, first thought for most of us Blossom with b52 wings nose diving lions after lambs and goats food. Topic was very deep but fun and i learnt something new which was cool, M would pop out of his box every so often so say some thing deep or just to say that's a load of crap lol as per normal the place falls apart when he is told to go back in to his box. I wish the meetings were on DVD as this topic would make an excellent TV show, would have to be on after the watershed though firstly because we are all so beautiful and our use of the Queens English can on times leave a lot to be desired. S with his normal humor just keeping us on track as we start to go off on one of our tangent thoughts. I admit i found it hard going on time but that's due to pain and i was a bit low.

I'm not shure what was wrong last night but a few people were a little low hope every one perks up a bit today and i will pray for that to happen.

just read Liz's blog topics are brilliant, and always leave me smiling.

H do your essays lol you know you want to (never put off till tomorrow something you can do today) T seemed to have a good weekend which I'm pleased about but had a bad day on Monday ill continue to pray for her every day and all so for H who was down as well

hope you enjoy my bit
May your God bless you and look after you

Tuesday, 28 November 2006

bits and bobs

tuesday morning

Its 6:22am on Tuesday morning, a lot has happened since my last post, Sunday turned out to be a good day dad came down for a while in the morning and hes well and we chatted about family and mam which was very lifting. Sunday evening we had the calender launch down in 1eyelid that was hysterical but all the proceeds go to the local MS. i don't the club that organised it are great and i get on with all of them.

Yesterday I started working properly for the WRC Wales GB over the service park I'm looking forward to this week as it will be long days but i really enjoy it as i have followed rallying since i was a small child and for the past ten years i have been involved in the running of it.

bad news I came off my bike yesterday combination of water and diesel, hurt my hip but I'm OK bit stiff, I've damaged the front wheel and one fork leg also the front mudguard so it may be a bit expensive to put rite in on go but it has to be done its still rideable so in happy with that.

well i can hear the rain again lol its Wales and its winter and as i have said in previous posts there is a reason for it lol ( I love god he has such a sense of humor)

zacs tonight looking forward to that any way got to go being piked up in ten Min's .

Saturday, 25 November 2006

Just a few things

these are just a few pics i thought id post .

Indian Larry gone but never forgoten

sat nov 25

This is the last pic of my mum , i miss her she is now safe from all the pressures of living on earth and safe in the hands of god , she was the only person i could talk to about anything at all and know that she would not judge but try to give good advice, this will be my first Christmas without her it will be strange. I still love her and wish that she was still alive to see the change in me from a thug and self centred prat to what has happened to me this year buy asking god to take control of my life I'm till an idiot on days and a wind up merchant but now i feel different which is good.

went around the pub yesterday to see a few mates J, T, K they are great and we played some pool i was dreadful yesterday lol .

H was going to talk to my cos Steve yesterday and see if he is going to come to zacs it will be nice if he does as i get on great with him wen i see him.

not sure what I'm up to today .

Friday, 24 November 2006


its Friday morning and I'm feeling lost and low don't know why as it has been a good week and next week the WRC comes to wales (Swansea) and i will be there all week working it will be strange in two ways first to see the people i haven't seen since last year i.e the pit crews drivers and helpers so that will be good . 2Nd not seeing the people i normally see local if it makes sense. I now i will be very busy so my mind will be occupied a lot of the time but a lot has happened since last year wen the rally was in town (my mother has died, i have come out as a christian learnt to put other people before myself which has been hard, had a mini breakdown which I'm still trying to get to grips with) so as you can see a lot has changed . made a load of new Friends who i really can call friends in Zacs and the GS . i wish i could be there for every one to love and comfort them but there are times when i just need to hide away from the world.

last night at zacs was good i learnt a lot about a person who comes there on a Tuesday and was quiet shocked the she knows my sister and her family it was good, H was as normal full of bounce and love for all and still she doesn't engage her brain before talking to some of us which is so cute and unfortunately i have a very quick wit , other good news is Stephen has been dry for 24 hours which was fantastic i hope he can keep it up and will pray for him.

myself i have a problem which i don't know what to do about i will pray on it today so please add me to your prays today as i need gods guidance over this matter .
Thank you

Wednesday, 22 November 2006


Wow what a night the storey of Mary and Joseph as i have never really looked at it before, what a prat i have been all these years, once again i have missed the bigger picture. The two writings of Liz were fantastic as she read Marys lament a chill ran through me and i wish i had been there to help her a Joseph but they would not need me as they had god looking out for them. i feel so privileged to have been there last night, and feel so enlightened, thank you Liz , thank you Sean and of also blossom, my past hatred of Christmas was so wrong.

T seemed ok last night and drew what seemed to me a baby inside two fish facing opposite directions. which i thought was a baby wrapped in the love of god. mark has a few problems which i hope i have helped him with today, and Brian was back .

I care for all the people who go to Zacs and feel good when i go there for the is no class there you are what you are full stop.

Tuesday, 21 November 2006


It's Tuesday, Zacs tonight cant wait to see everyone it will be nice . had a very down day yesterday but that's life i felt like i just wanted to curl up and hide from the world, thank you Liz for posting some comments its nice to know someone is reading my mad thoughts. you then realise your not alone in the world. Been thinking about church today why do we send the little children out of church during the meeting (Sunday school) is it we are hiding something from them or what didn't Jesus call all the children to him so they could listen to what he had to say so have we as adults over complected the word of god, and wouldn't it be nice for children to see adults really loving god through songs and worship. wouldn't it be nice if instead of long words we just made it simple so as a family we could worship together. I don't know.

Any way hope T is ok and L has a fixed washer lol.

will find out tonight about those two as for my main topic well i may find out one day.

on another not was reading G2 last night (part of the Guardian news paper) and an article drew my eye it was about a man who was playing the part of puggsey bear for children in need in Leeds. and what happened to him through the week where a gang of youths attacked him trying to remove his head, (the bear) and the abuse he received during the week but he did say something which I really liked that on the Friday a Gig Issue seller gave him a few coins and said as long as its for the children i don't mind, that really touched me that someone with out gave to what he seen as a greater cause.

be nice to roofless people and they will be nice back tenfold.

Sunday, 19 November 2006


as you can tell from my writing below (sunday) i am in a strange mood part of me is worried about us all (as winter draws in) the 2 articls are defenatly me today both want to love and protect you all , we all need love sometime and i find that the love of god is alwas the even when i make a mess of things i know he loves me which is great.

hered some thing to day which got my mind ticking over (God is good) it refers to some thing in linden yes he is good but in stead to saying god is good at those times why not just say thank you God (dad , Abba, ) i know god loves me and when i feel low i know hes at my side sometimes carring me some times pushing me to take the next step down the path he has planned for me, yes god is good .

as the people who know me know i talk to god a lot more than i pary to him , as when riding on my motor cycle he is allways my pillion, (havent scared him yet lol) and i talk while riding to him or walking down the street , one of the thing i learnt a long time ago about god just like a father he some times has to say no but that does not mean i love him any less. for example while out riding along the m4 it was raining quite hard and i asked him please can you let the rain ease up fo a while , not hearing his reple at first i started to feel dejected and stoped talking to hime for a few miles as he must also be getting as wet as me by now but there again hes probably got excellent waterproofs, any way he showed me as we were passing a lake the low water line which was well below where it should have been and right there i understood, that the earth needs rain and i felt humble that i had missed the big picture and though only of my self , I then said sorry and carried on my way talking and sharing a joke or to with him taking care of me.

as winter draws in

Survial tips

make sure you lock your house at night, check all doors and windows. Fit a chain lock to the door which is used to answer th public. Check the detales of the person who calls. Eg the gas man, even if you are expecting them. never let anyone into your home if you have not checked them out.

on the street.
try and avoid gans, even if you have to cross the street from them. Avoid town and city centres after a football match, bus stations at night, parks after dark. and pubs at closing time.

In the car.
Never give hitch hikers a lift at any time.
never stop to anyone broken down on the side of the road, even a woman. If you see someone who needs helpstop at the next phone box or use a mobile and call the police.


Dont Quit

When things go wrong as they sometimes will,
when the road you're trudging seems all uphill,
when funds are low and debts are high,
and instead of a smile you have a sigh,
when care is pressing you down a bit,
rest in Gods love - and never quit.
Life can be strange with its twists and turns,
and many failed man's turned away,
when with Gods love he would have won the day.

Don't give up though the pace may feel slow,
for you may succeed with another go.
Success if failure turned inside out,
the silve glint in the cloud of dout.
You never can tell how close you are,
the goal may be near when it seems so far,
so turn to the lord when you're hardest hit;
put your trust in him - and never quit.

this pomem means a lot to me and i hope it will help you also .

Friday, 17 November 2006

1st time

This is my first post . im not that good at writing so please excuse me. Its friday and ive just come back from town again , read lizes posts and zacs posts i enjoy going to zacs its a place where i dont feel out of place the people there are warm and open and the discutions are very lively and offten remind me of a billy connerly show (the topic of disscution offten wanders but sean does his best to bring it back ) we are currently reading the christmas story ive allways had mixed emotions over christmas as my own birthday is on christmas day and because of that felt that christmas day should always be on the 1st of the month of Jan or march (change of calender ) as we refer to BC as before christ and AD as after he was born sh surly his birthday sould be on the 1st of the month of the new year. any way i cant change that so over the years i have gotten used to it .